How to Kick Bad Habits that Destroy Your Self-Esteem
I can’t do this. I don’t know anything. She’s prettier than me. Does this sound like you? If so, you may have unknowingly fallen into bad habits that destroy your self-esteem.
I remember having low self-esteem during my adolescent years. But once I got down to the root cause (thank you therapy sessions), I overcame those feelings and boosted my self-worth.
My causes were thinking I had to be perfect at everything and letting outside judgment play a huge role in how I chose to live my life.

I know I’m not the only person who has dealt with low self-esteem, but I don’t think it’s talked about as much as it should be.
So I’m sharing 5 habits that could be contributing to your low self-esteem.
I’ll also share my tips on kicking these habits to the curb! What good is it to know why your self-esteem is low but not have a way to resolve it?
Table of Contents
- Habit #1: Consistently Comparing Yourself to Others
- Habit #2: Staying Stuck in Negative Self-talk or Thoughts
- Habit #3: Keeping Negative People Around You
- Habit #4: Setting Perfection as the End Goal
- Habit #5: Allowing Judgment to Dictate Your Life
- Build Your Self-Esteem and Self-Worth
Stop Bad Habits That Lower Self-Esteem
Habit #1: Consistently Comparing Yourself to Others
Why It’s an Issue:
We’ve all been guilty of this one – comparing ourselves to others. And in some situations, I’d say comparison may be necessary.
Seeing others in action and doing things we want to do can serve as motivation. It can inspire you to better yourself and work towards your goals.
On another note, constantly comparing is what leads to jealousy. It also leads to sadness and defeat.
When you can only see shortcomings in yourself, it can make you envious of those around you.
How to Kick the Habit:
Start paying attention to your strengths. What are you good at? And before you say nothing, we are all good at something.
Spending your energy focusing on things you’re good at or things you like about yourself leaves less time to focus on what other people are doing.
If you don’t know much about who you are, find ways to connect with yourself to get the answers you need.

Habit #2: Staying Stuck in Negative Self-talk or Thoughts
Why It’s an Issue:
Telling yourself that you can’t do something means you won’t do it.
Your mind already believes you aren’t capable before you’ve even made any attempts. And with this belief, how are you going to accomplish anything?
You’ve already canceled your goals before you begin to work toward them.
Staying stuck in constant negativity impacts the way we navigate through life. It keeps us stressed and stops us from taking action.
Remember that our words and thoughts are powerful.
How to Kick the Habit:
Start shifting from negativity to positive. When you have a negative thought, reframe it into something positive.
Does this mean you’ll never have another negative thought or speak a negative word again? Absolutely not.
It’s not about ridding yourself of all negativity. It’s about being intentional and recognizing when you’re allowing yourself to be overtaken by negativity.
If you struggle to calm the negativity in your life, maybe turn your efforts towards finding peace.
Habit #3: Keeping Negative People Around You
Why It’s an Issue:
Misery loves company. Isn’t that the saying? Allowing negative people to stay in your life can impact you mentally, physically, and emotionally.
And you know the kind of people I’m talking about.
A friend who’s never excited about your accomplishments but seems to find fault in everything you do. Or maybe you have a boss who yells at you when you make a mistake at work.
People spread negativity both intentionally and unintentionally.
But if you’ve spoken to them about it and the behavior hasn’t changed, you should move accordingly. You have to do what is best for you.
How to Kick the Habit:
Start showing up for yourself every single day.
This may look like distancing yourself from these people over time or even speaking up for yourself in situations in which you are mistreated.
And yes I know this is hard, but it’s like a muscle. You have to keep working to see the growth.
In some instances, you may find it best to avoid all contact with certain people. Or to have as little contact as possible.
There are people I choose to stay away from to protect my energy and peace of mind. I will still be cordial, but that’s about as far as it goes.
Habit #4: Setting Perfection as the End Goal
Why It’s an Issue:
Trying to live up to this perfect persona of yourself inhibits you. You’re trying so hard to be perfect that you never take risks or step outside the box.
Trying to be perfect – or thinking that I had to be perfect – ruined me for a long time. It stopped me from living life.
Letting my hair down and having a good time was not something I considered. Ever.
I didn’t want to step out of the imaginary line that I had created, and I didn’t allow myself to mess up or make mistakes.
Thankfully, I’ve moved on from that space in my life.
How to Kick the Habit:
Stop worrying about being perfect all the time! Seriously.
Work through these affirmations to help you overcome your perfectionist mindset.
And allow yourself to make mistakes and not beat yourself up over it.
Breathe. Let your hair down. Relax a little and just enjoy life.
Habit #5: Allowing Judgment to Dicate Your Life
Why It’s an Issue:
People will judge you, but it is what it is.
As long as we prioritize what others think of us, we will be limited in our happiness and the goals we want to reach.
If every single decision you make is based on how others will perceive it then you aren’t living for yourself.
Are there things you dream of doing but don’t because it’s outside the norm or a traditional way of doing things? Are you living a life you hate but are still too scared to step out of the box because of people and their expectations?
You don’t need anyone’s permission to be the real you.
How to Kick the Habit:
Stop caring what people think. I know we hear people say this all the time. It’s not easy but it’s true.
There have been so many things I didn’t do because I was too worried about what people thought.
And I regret it because I let so much time pass when I could have been working towards my biggest dreams instead.
Starting this blog was one of my biggest dreams, and I put it off for 5 entire years. 5 years. That’s 1,825 consecutive days where I did nothing to work on my goals.
If you’re finding yourself trapped in the judgment and expectations of others, you may be a people pleaser.
I was, and you can check out this post to find out how I stopped my people-pleasing tendencies.

Build Your Self-Esteem and Self-Worth
You’re in charge of how you feel about yourself.
Don’t give people or experiences the power to dictate how you feel about yourself.
And when you recognize that you have bad habits that hurt your self-esteem, remember your worth and work to get rid of those habits.
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